A 35-foot fall didn't kill Michael Wagner. The 18-year failure of the safety net did. Before he died, he recorded 694 videos explaining how. Brittany Wagner Produced by Alexander Stockton Ms. Wagner is an award-winning filmmaker and writer. Her feature documentary, “One of Many,” a story of chronic pain, caregiving and the legacies we leave behind, is currently in production. Michael Wagner was a construction worker when he fell 35 feet on a job. He survived, but what came after — nearly 18 years of chronic pain, financial hardship and fighting for help — slowly unraveled his life. In 2018, he died by suicide. After his death, his daughter, Brittany Wagner, discovered 694 private videos he had recorded over the years, documenting his struggle to navigate workers’ compensation, disability benefits and the health care system. Seven years after finding those video diaries, Brittany pieces together what they reveal about her father’s final years — and how he fell through the social safety net that was supposed to catch him. If you are having thoughts of suicide, call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline or go to Speaking Of Suicide.com/resources for a list of additional resources.

Brittany Wagner: I thought I understood why my dad took his own life. But he had left me and my sister a cryptic email: “I have 694 videos for you girls. Sorry I can’t be there to discuss.” Videos? What videos? It’s like he had sent us on a scavenger hunt from the grave, which was very him. And then I remembered: his i Pod Touch. Archival clip of Michael Wagner: Hey, girls, this is Pops. I just want to let you know that I love you and there’s nothing you could have done to have saved me. This is something that the government has created. They have created this problem, and they’re going to kill a lot more loved ones.

Michael: I kind of want this story to be told about how it is for a worker that gets hurt. I did my job and this company screwed me. My lawyers screwed me. My doctors screwed me. My government screwed me. Brittany: It’s been seven years since I found these videos. And ever since, I’ve been trying to piece together what’s really to blame for my dad’s death. Michael: I used to be a carpenter. Just a happy-go-lucky, just hyped-up kind of guy. And I loved the work I did. That was really my identity, being a carpenter. I was a strong worker — producing, paying my taxes and doing my thing, supporting my girls. If you’re happy, you’re successful. I was on top of the world. See, I was on the beam crew, doing these beams, all of these: Boom, boom, boom, boom. And they had a lift. Grove lift — 66-foot man lift that was a telescoping man lift — it went up like click, click, click, click. The lift had been making noises. We were told we had to use it, so me and the other guy got in it. And it popped. And we just dropped. Brittany: He didn’t break anything or have any scars. No tests showed what was wrong. He looked fine, so he was expected to be fine. But he was in horrific pain. Michael: It hurts all over my body. I feel miserable. Oh [expletive]. Feeling like this sucks. It’s just ungodly. You know, flesh ripping off your bones, stabs — full body stabs. It’s nuts.

Brittany: Documenting a battle with government programs that were supposed to be there to help him. Michael: I just want this story to be told about how it is for a worker that gets hurt. This is something that the government has created.