Late night hosts roasted Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth after a watchdog report revealed lavish Pentagon spending under his watch. Stephen Colbert highlighted fruit basket stands costing $12,000 while Jimmy Kimmel mocked the contradiction between claims of "making the military manly again" and ordering fruit baskets with stands. The spending spree included $140,000 on doughnuts, $124,000 on ice cream machines, and $3,160 on children's character stickers. Colbert quipped that despite all the treats, "nobody came to Pete Hegseth's birthday party."

Beyond the fruit baskets, the Pentagon reportedly spent $2 million on crab legs, $6.9 million on lobster tail, and over $15 million on rib-eye steaks in 2025. The hosts compared the spending to "My 600-pound Defense Department" and suggested the purchases were "hearkening back to our founders" with Colbert's joke about Paul Revere's "One if by surf, two if by turf." Kimmel added that if you need fruit at work, "do the normal thing: Put a clementine in your tote and find it three weeks later when it's a furry, gray golf ball."

The comedy segment comes amid broader scrutiny of Pentagon spending and Hegseth's leadership. The late night mockery reflects growing public skepticism about government waste and the disconnect between military priorities and these luxury food purchases, particularly as the Defense Department faces ongoing budget pressures and strategic challenges.